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You Might Be In A Horror Novel If…

The 25 Best Gothic Horror Books

You are in an abandoned mansion in the middle of nowhere.

You are a governess, left alone with oddly acting or obviously evil children.

You are isolated from the rest of the world by weather, geography, and/or another outside force beyond your control.

You do not trust the evidence of your own senses.

 

You might be in The Turn of the Screw by Henry James,

or This House Is Haunted by John Boyne

 

It is stormy, dark and gloomy.

You are the captive of a scheming and sadistic governess, teacher, caretaker, or relative.

You are trapped in the walls, a basement, a closet, or an attic.

There is a hedge maze, Escher-style stairs, or carnivorous beast on the property.

Authorities are absent or unable to help you.

 

You might be in Flowers in the Attic by V.C. Andrews,

or Misery by Stephen King

Your house is a former asylum or school, built over a graveyard, or the site of a cold-case murder.

You have specifically been told not to open a door.

Ghosts are either menacing you, possessing you, or asking you for help.

An inanimate object starts talking to you.

Someone is leading you through dark, underground tunnels or catacombs.

Your nightmares seem very, very real.

 

You might be in Down A Dark Hall by Lois Duncan,

or the stories of Edgar Allan Poe

 

It is bright and sunny, and everyone is very, very, happy.

 

You are uneasy without obvious reason.

You are uneasy with obvious reason.

Everyone in town is related to (or at least knows) everyone else.

There is a terrible secret in your town’s past (or present).

A disturbing community ritual, probably involving demon worship, is scheduled for the near future.

You are offered a favor in exchange for your soul.

You find a book or journal that clearly will summon an ancient evil.

 

You might be in  The Thirteen  by Susie Moloney

or The Stepford Wives by Ira Levin

 

A classified, experimental government program has gone awry.

An inexplicable and incurable virus has infected the majority of the population.

A malicious mythical creature attempts to eat you, assimilate you, or seduce you.

A vigilante or cult-like group is bent on destruction.

 

You might be in The Strain by Chuck Hogan and Guillermo del Toro

or The Fireman  by Joe Hill

 

Giant, mutated creatures are approaching.

Ominous, tentacled creatures appear on the scene.

The narrator or main character is showing clear evidence of insanity.

 

You might be in Maplecroft by Cherie Priest, Clickers by J.F. Gonzalez,

or the works of H.P. Lovecraft.

 

People are dying in brutal, horrifying, appalling ways.

Someone, or something, wants to eat you for dinner.

 

You might be in Succulent Prey by Wrath James White,

or Monster Island by David Wellington

 

Your perceptions are unreliable or distorted.

You can’t trust your memories.

You can’t trust the media.

You might be in A Head Full of Ghosts by Paul Tremblay

 

You have a feeling of bone deep terror.

That unending sense of dread just won’t go away.

You hear a loud “slam” and things go dark…

 

You’re probably trapped in a horror novel. Let’s hope that your reader decides to open up the book again, and gives you a chance to escape!

 

 

Editor’s note: not all books are appropriate for all readers.. and I wouldn’t wish any of you to be trapped in any of these! 

 

 

 

The Best and Worst of Stephen King

I think we can all agree that Stephen King is such a part of American pop culture that it’s hard to have gotten through the past forty years without experiencing at least one of his stories in book, graphic novel, television, or movie form. Even people who don’t read horror may have read Stephen King- my sister, for instance, who has complete disdain for genre fiction, loved The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon. It’s actually one of the few books that she and my dad, who has much different reading tastes, will both discuss enthusiastically with each other.

King is a huge draw for reluctant readers. One King-obsessed guy I knew in college had never read anything until he discovered and devoured King. The Stand is the ONLY book I know of that my best friend has read cover to cover twice (she also brought the audiobook of Nightmares and Dreamscapes with her on an endless car trip we took together one summer to the Pennsic War. King in audio is pretty awesome).

Still, I am really pretty darn impressed that someone took the time to read everything he’s ever written and rank the books in order (click here to see the rankings). I know there are people who have read all of his stuff, but I certainly can’t claim to have done so. The rankings, as rankings always are, are pretty subjective and open to debate, but my gosh! It takes perserverance to get through some of those books (ahem, IT), and for the very reason that many non-readers of horror have found a King book they like, it’s hard, I think, to find someone who will find that all of his books will be personally appealing. I think that actually makes it hard for librarians to know which of his books to recommend. If someone comes in looking for another King book, is it because they loved Lisey’s Story, or because they were scared out of their wits by The Shining? I’d love to know if Becky Siegel Spratford, the RA queen of horror, has a list of read-alikes for them, since so many of them are so different in nature.

I will admit that I haven’t read a lot of the books that made the top ten. Some I had no desire to read, others I had no access to (a lot of the King I read was stolen from my dad’s bedside table). And my favorites, with the exception of Misery, didn’t make the top ten on this particular list. Carrie is right there at the top for me. When I read it in high school (which is the best time to read it) I literally jumped out of my seat when the bell at the end of study hall rang.

So, King. What are your top picks? Do you agree with the author of the rankings list?