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Book Review: The Girl With the Lollipop Eyes by Lucy Leitner

The Girl With The Lollipop Eyes, by Lucy Leitner

Blood Bound Publishing, 2023

ISBN: 9781940250618

Available: Paperback, Kindle edition

Buy:  Amazon.com

 

 

The back cover advertises this as a “detective adventure in slacker noir.”  I’m not sure what that means, but this type of book works well when read in an overstuffed recliner with a six-pack of wobbly-pops.  It‘s not the story alone that drives this, it’s mainly the characters and overall style.  No further doubt: Leitner has a unique writing style all her own and deserves more recognition.

 

This isn’t a horror novel, it’s a detective novel, in the style of the old Spillane ones.  But it’s written in Leitner’s offbeat, humorous way, and that makes it a lot more entertaining than anything Mickey wrote in the Mike Hammer series.  The book is carried start to finish by wannabe PI Thor Cole, his miscreant sidekicks, and the writing.

 

This is old-fashioned detective fiction, with plenty of pounding the pavement, talking to people for leads, and the occasional fight.  On the surface, there’s not much there.  That’s where Leitner’s skill comes in: she turns a simple plot into an addicting rush of a read.

 

You can’t help but love Thor Cole and his attempts to be a brilliant detective. He lives in a seedy Pittsburgh apartment, and things just never seem to go right.  He gets in trouble with his roommate Brittanie for using household appliances as weapons in fights and not replacing them (this guy should advertise for the George Foreman Grill).  He manages to bash himself in the head with a bicycle in a misguided attempt to prevent bike theft.  Somehow, most of his “detective” work has him winding up at bars and drinking too much.  He’s a perfect folk hero for the neighborhood, and his antics, and constant snarky way of looking at things, are what makes him such an engrossing character.

 

The sleuthing part of the book is simple enough. Cole and company are investigating a hit and run in their trashy neighborhood, and it’s a highly entertaining ride as they smash and crash their way through the case: subtlety is not in their vocabulary.  The case does evolve into a larger plot concerning the whole neighborhood and sleazy developers, but this is really all about the tone and style, and it’s perfect for the characters and neighborhood.  That’s what makes Cole great: he’s the kind of dude that ordinary, blue-collar people will love.  The story itself may not be new, but the writing certainly is, and keeps readers engaged right to the end.

 

Leitner also does a great job bringing Pittsburgh to life: she clearly knows Pennsylvania and its quirks.  You have to be a local to know about beer stores, swill brands like Iron City and Straub, the unofficial Steelers fight song (not a good choice), etc.

 

Bottom line: it’s a don’t miss.  Leitner has already shown a singular voice with her dystopian satires: add “multi-faceted” to the list with this “slacker noir” tale.  Hopefully, Cole will return, and isn’t put out to pasture: who needs a stylish Sonny Crockett for a detective when you have a banged-up, alcohol-chugging Thor Cole? Cole would have whipped him in a fight anyhow.  Highly recommended.

 

Reviewed by Murray Samuelson

Book Review: Outrage: Level 10 by Lucy Leitner

cover art for Outrage: Level 10 by Lucy Leitner

Outrage: Level 10 by Lucy Leitner

Blood Bound Publishing, 2021

ISBN: 9781940250496

Available: Paperback, Kindle edition

Buy: Amazon.com

 

Outrage Level 10 succeeds as both a thriller and a darkly humorous look at today’s overly sensitive “cancel culture” society taken to extremes.  It’s an exciting story, and the setting will force readers to ask questions about where we are headed as a society, and what we would consider a “perfect’” world.

 

It’s a strange future that Alex Malone, ex-head breaker for the now-defunct Pittsburgh Penguins (a hockey team) and now a cop, lives in.  There is no more government, just the Speaker, as the mouthpiece of the People; the Hammer, who is the People’s enforcer and… that’s it.  It’s all the will of the People in regards to policy, crime, and everything else, decided by popular vote of the citizens through their phones and various social applications.  Almost all crime consists of someone offending someone else.  Once it’s been posted online, if the outrage meter hits high enough through people commenting, the offenders face the Hammer, who most likely will condemn the perpetrators to the mysterious Maze, from which almost no one returns.  People do live much longer, since all diseases have been cured, or the causing substances banned, but is it worth the price?

 

That’s the world of Alex, and as a cop, he’s a member of an almost unnecessary profession (apparently “defund the police”  REALLY took hold) since everything is by popular fiat, and everyone is policing each other.  It doesn’t help that the few cops left are reviled by pretty much everyone.   Alex tries a new drug designed to treat his CTE, and the drug, through visions, pulls him into a mystery involving senior citizens disappearing from retirement homes.  As Alex soon finds out, it’s hard to solve a case that affects the few people left in power, and even harder when everyone is looking for an excuse, real or imagined, to take him down.

 

The plotline is an intriguing mystery and a tough nut to crack.  Alex makes an excellent protagonist, and is sympathetic as a person who really has no value in a politically correct society.  That is, until he remembers the old police motto, “to protect and serve”.  In Leitner’s world, protecting means eliminating anyone whom you disagree with, not helping for the common good.

 

Leitner”s vision of a world gone crazy provides the excellent story backdrop.  She wisely keeps her own views out of it, instead using her razon-sharp humor to get the point across, without coming off as preachy.  That’s the mark of excellent satire; the ability to write without tipping your own hand to the readers.  She’s shown this skill in other works like Bad Vibrations, and it’s on full display here.  Leitner has created a terrifying world, where people are condemned for accidentally serving the wrong food, since that can be seen as aggression or some sort of -ism.

 

Bottom line: another excellent work from one of the smartest writers of dystopian satire today.  Recommended.

 

Reviewed by Murray Samuelson

 

Book Review: Influence by Lucy Leitner

Influence by Lucy Leitner

Blood Bound Books, 2023

ISBN: 9781940250571

Availabilite: Paperback, Kindle edition

Buy: Amazon.com

 

Influence is a 120 page book containing six of the author’s short stories, some were published previously in other analogies.  The stories are all good to excellent, and Leitner makes good use of her scathing wit to destroy many of the habits of millenialls and Gen Z that people find annoying.  People that enjoy stories about self-obsessed people getting their comeuppance will love this book, as will most horror/suspense fans.

 

There’s a nice bit of variety in Leitner’s style.  One story is written wholly as a series of Instagram posts, another is the script of a podcast.  The longest story, “Karen”,  is also the best.  Karen exemplifies all the bad traits of the younger generation that people love to hate: social media obsession, complete self absorption, superiority complex, etc.  She also loves to run over obese people with her car, since (according to Karen) they are pathetic excuses of humanity.  Her life changes when everyone around her is able to know what Karen really thinks about them, but would never say out loud.  Naturally, the results aren’t pretty, but they are bloody, and readers will be cheering as Karen’s life becomes a living hell.

 

The other stories are also good fun, with the same traits that make “Karen” so enjoyable.  “Get Me Out Of This Shimmering Oasis”, is an Instagram-styled story,   Using ridiculous health trends as a jumping-off point, it succeeds in creating an intriguing tale of taking self-obsession too far, and also points out the silliness of people blaming health woes on obscure ailments that don’t exist.  “Xorcize.me” has a wellness twist to it also, but in this, all problems are due to obscure demons.  Those demons, of course, can be evicted from a person through a home exorcism kit, available for purchase online. This story wins the award for ‘most entertaining dialogue’ due to the snappy patter and sarcasm of the podcast host in the story.  “The Shoe Box Challenge” is a nutty tale twined around the outrageous things people will do for their 15 seconds of YouTube fame. The other two tales are somewhat more straightforward, but no less entertaining.

 

Bottom line: if you like Lucy Leitner’s style before (one of her books, Bad Vibrations, was previously reviewed on this site) then this will certainly tide you over until she gets another full length one completed.  The book would have been worth it for “Karen” alone, so getting the other stories is a nice bonus.  The author has a knack for stories that mix originality with the ability to poke fun at modern conventions: this book should help to expand her fanbase.  Recommended.

 

Reviewed by Murray Samuelson