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Baby Got Books- Horror Remix

I have to thank Sarah Wendell of Smart Bitches, Trashy Books for pointing me in the direction of this link: fantasy author JIm C. Hines’ “Baby Got Books”, a great riff on the Sir Mix-a-Lot song. And now, thanks to our very talented reviewer and zombie editor, MonsterLibrarian.com presents our very own genre-specific version: “Baby Got Books- Horror Remix”. Warning- not for the faint of heart.

Baby Got Books: Horror Remix

[Intro]
Oh, my, god. Becky, look at her book.
It is so big. *scoff* It looks like,
one of those Stephen King books.
But, you know, who understands Stephen King? *scoff*
They only read it, because of,
like, alien butt parasites, ‘kay?
I mean, her book, is just so big.
I can’t believe it’s just so thick, it’s like,
out there, I mean – gross. Look!
It’s just so … creepy!

[Sir Mix-a-Lot]
I like big books and I can not lie
You other readers can’t deny
That when the cover comes by with a big-ass mace
And a bloody psycho face
You get sprung, wanna pull out your eyes
‘Cause you gotta know who dies
Deep in the pages you’re reading
You’re hooked and people keep on bleeding
Oh baby, I wanna go post-apoc
Or maybe deep special ops
My parents tried to warn me
But every time I fall for the dark and gory
Ooh, cover-embossin’
You got vampires need crossin’?
Well, tease me, bleed me
‘Cause you ain’t all sparkly
I’ve seen them hatin’
To hell with literary fakin’
It’s lean, mean,
Got it goin’ like Brian Keene
I’m tired of happy endings
All the conflict getting mendings
Take your love stories and shove that
Gotta have something to hack

So, readers! (Yeah!) Readers! (Yeah!)
Got your Joe Hill book? (Hell yeah!)
Then read it! (Read it!) Read it! (Read it!)
Read that horror book!
Baby got books!

(Ligotti and Garton)
Baby got books!

Posted on August 26, 2011 by , Reply

Giant Princesses, Part 2

I wrote before about little girls and the princess thing, but little girls aren’t the only ones who go for princesses. I always like finding a princess who rocks. Generally, that ends up being Cinderella, because she’s not afraid to get her hands dirty (and I am pleased as punch to have discovered a kick-butt Cinderella in Jim Hines’ Princess books), but I’m gaining more respect for Rapunzel all the time. And, okay, it’s a commercial for a hair straightener, but this Rapunzel literally rocks.

I promise that I’ll have a book list of awesome princess books at some point, too. I just like seeing the media bust a stereotype they helped create.

Posted on July 30, 2011 by , Reply

Summer Reading Recommendations: Staff Picks

As promised, here are some recreational reading titles recommended by our staff reviewers. As always, make sure you know what you’re getting into. Not every book is a good fit for every reader. Just a note- Wrath James White is not for the weak of stomach.

Kirsten’s recommendations: Allison Hewitt Is Trapped by Madeleine Roux and Red Moon Rising by Peter Moore (YA), and the very funny Bad Kitty books by Nick Bruel (children’s)

Michele’s recommendations: The Snow Queen’s Shadow (Princess Novels, #4) by Jim Hines and Magic Slays (Kate Daniels, #5) by Ilona Andrews

Colleen’s recommendations: Blood & Gristle by Michael Louis Calvillo, Bone Marrow Stew by Tim Curran, and Skulls by Tim Marquitz (YA)

Brandi’s recommendations:  The Seance by John Harwood and The Crossroads by Chris Grabenstein (children’s)

Erik’s recommendations: The Templar Chronicles by Joseph Nassise, Wolf Hunt by Jeff Strand, and Resurrection by Tim Curran

Sheila’s recommendations: The Brain Eater’s Bible by J.D. McGhoul and Pat Kilbane (this has an iPad app as well), and Pride and Prejudice and Zombies– Dreadfully Ever After by Steve Hockensmith

David’s recommendations: Population Zero by Wrath James White and Fathers and Sons (Blackguard, #1) by Edward R. Morris (David also mentioned his own book, Hunting the Moon Tribe, which came out in April, but I’m sure there’s no self-interest there).

As always, not every book is appropriate for every reader.  We’ve reviewed some of these books here at MonsterLibrarian.com, but not all of them, so make sure you check to see that the book you are thinking of reading is really your cup of tea. Have a great summer reading, and check back later for more!

Posted on June 8, 2011 by , Reply
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