bizarro | Musings of the Monster Librarian

Book Review: LGBT: Lust, Gore, Bloodshed & Terror by Wol-vriey

LGBT: Lust, Gore, Bloodshed & Terror by Wol-vriey

Burning Bulb Publishing, 2024

ISBN: 9781964172002

Available: Paperback, Kindle edition

The author himself has referred to his writing as ‘bizarro fiction,’ and this story certainly qualifies. It also qualifies as a good improvement over his last two novels. The book feels like a Greek tragicomedy of errors, with a lot of raunch, blood, and hilarious irony mixed in. Oh, and a vampire, too. And a witch. And a crazed scientist/artist. It’s a good read, for the excitement as well as the laughs, and it keeps you guessing all the way.

This is a ‘character web’ story, with four disparate main characters who barely know each other, and a host of secondary characters that slowly tie their fates together. The main players are: Lavelle, a sex-crazed lesbian porn actress who is hounded by a lovestruck ghost; Greg, the elderly gay man cuckolded by his young trophy husband; Bryn, a lovelorn bisexual vampire eternally searching for her soulmate; and Tammi, a trans woman short on cash for gender affirmation surgery. It’s certainly an eclectic crew! The four of them all plan on doing not-so-nice things to others to improve their lives, but…things just never seem to quite work out according to plan. What makes the story fun, is all the unexpected ways things just go to hell in a handbasket. Just when it seems that it might get predictable, the story swings off in an unexpected fashion.

The story does an excellent job pulling all the plot threads together a little at a time, and heaping delicious irony at every turn. The characters are great fun, often due to their deadpan way of looking at things. My personal favorite: one character’s initial response to winding up in everlasting Purgatory is, “this sucks already.” None of the four main characters are particularly nice or sympathetic (well, maybe Greg, but only at first) and that works very well for the plot. It makes it more fun when each of them reaps what they sow. The whole story is completely over the top. The entire thing is a puzzle, guessing who is going to get killed, condemned, or cursed next, and it usually doesn’t happen the way you would expect it to. The unpredictability of the story is one of its big selling points, and that alone makes it worth the read.

Bottom line time: it’s a good book from an author with a pretty large catalogue of stories to his credit This certainly ranks in the upper echelon of his works. Just remember, this is ADULTS ONLY material, it’s not for your kids!

Reviewed by Murray Samuelson

Book Review: Jigglyspot and the Zero Intellect by PD Alleva

Jigglyspot and the Zero Intellect by PD Alleva

Chamber Door Publishing, 2023

ISBN: 9781735168630

Available: Preorder hardcover, paperback. Kindle edition

Buy: Bookshop.org | Amazon.com

Jigglyspot should be the runaway favorite to win “World’s Weirdest Horror Book” for 2023. It’s a good read, but it is seriously out there: this is Clive Barker on hallucinogens. About the only drawback is it could have used another quick edit, there are some syntax mistakes and misused commas throughout the book.

It’s not possible to tell much of the plot without spoiling the book, so let’s look at the starting threads. Jiggly has a number of threads, and the chapters (which are short, each only about 4 to 6 pages) consist of the point of view for one of the main characters, written in the third person, past tense. Surprisingly, with all the back and forth between viewpoints, it does NOT get confusing, to the credit of the author. That’s pretty impressive, considering how all over the place the plot is. The main characters and threads are:

Jigglyspot, a sadistic, part-warlock carnival clown who enjoys slicing and dicing annoying people with his scalpel, and is having an affair with a lady from another galaxy. He also enjoys live extraction of hormones (this is written in graphic detail) from the skulls of people, to keep himself young. A nice guy, he ain’t. Jiggly makes Pennywise seem like a reasonable choice to babysit your children.
Tyler, a high school student who channels his inner Charles Bronson to execute, vigilante-style, one of his classmates for unpunished crimes.
Lilly, a nice suburban mom, trying to do right by her children after their dad shoots himself.
Cassandra and Sharon: one a peon in a Hollywood talent agency, the other a struggling actress dreaming of the big time. They soon split into two separate story threads.
FBI agent John Mills, trying to solve a 20 year old cold case.

None of these seem related, for the first 200 of the 560 pages, and with the exception of Mills and Jiggly, they aren’t. It’s worth it to keep reading, because then the threads slowly draw together. Author Alleva clearly knows how to tension the plot strings at just the right time. Even when the stories seem unrelated, it’s interesting enough that readers will want to know what happens to their favorite character next.

Then the gloves come off and it all pulls together in bloody fashion. Jiggly makes enough of a mess to keep gorehound readers happy, including sadomasochistic sex, cannibalism (complete with the marinating of people) babies killed, Satan and demons, and a bit of an interstellar tie-in. In other words, the author threw in the kitchen sink, plus every other available appliance.

With so much going on, you’d think this mess would careen off the tracks… but somehow, it doesn’t. It’s impressive how Alleva manages to keep focused, and makes it understandable to the end. There are a few parts that could have used a touch more explanation but that was likely the author’s choice, and not a blatant omission. Readers will actually like and sympathize with the characters, even the not-so-nice ones. Jiggly, scumbag that he is, does have a strange appeal, and Tyler, the schoolkid executioner, is actually one of the most likable, due to his “screw you” attitude problem, combined with an actual moral backbone.

Bottom line time, folks! Verdict is: Jigglyspot goes in many directions, yet somehow still works and is worth the read. Recommended for fans of truly bizarro fiction that can handle some squish n’ splat.

Reviewed by Murray Samuelson.